A New Kind of Gift

February is just around the corner.

Stores are stocked with aisles of sticky, gooey goodness, adorable stuffed animals, brightly decorated cards, and assorted other Valentine's gifts.

Have you decided yet what you'll give your loved ones this Valentine's Day?

Will it be chocolate?  Candy?  A card?  Flowers?

What about a pledge?

I know.  It's not on the list of usual gifts for Valentine's Day, and you won't find it on the seasonal aisle of your favorite grocery store, but maybe this is the year to try something new.

Here's the challenge:

Commit to 14 days (from February 1st to February 14th) of no yelling, shouting, screaming, blow-ups, fits, hostile or impatient responses, or disrespect.

Commit to 14 days of respectful communication.

Commit to 14 days of giving those closest to you the gift of loving responses.

(And just for the record, it is true that sometimes the most loving response you could give would be to walk away.)

The reality is that no one is going to go 14 days without getting buttons pushed, but imagine the freedom of being able to get your needs met without shouting.

I talk to a lot of adults who believe that yelling and shouting are normal parts of family communication.  "Don't you have to yell to get children to listen?"

But what if it doesn't have to be the reality?  With all the media and cultural focus on civility, maybe now is a good time to start practicing the art of being civil with those we love most.

Ready for the rules?

1)  No shouting, yelling, screaming, or disrespect toward those you love.
2)  Write down your commitment.
3)  Give your commitment as a gift.  The timing isn't important.  Commit out loud ahead of time, or give your gift as a surprise.
4)  Get others to commit also.  It's easier if you don't have to do it alone.
5)  Don't give up.  If you aren't perfect at peaceful communication, be perfect at apologies.

The idea is to commit.  Do your best.  Reduce the friction and increase the closeness in interpersonal relationships.  It's an opportunity to experience yourself and experience those you love in a new way.

So are you in?

(For those taking the challenge, look for daily tips, ideas and anecdotes between February 1st and February 14th.)